This is the first in a series of posts in which I will try to describe what makes me tick, at least as far as I understand it, because I don’t really understand it.
Is he trying to fix something?
That was a comment about one of my sculptures.
Of course not, I thought, it’s just a sculpture about nothing. But there was something to that question, and there was a reason for making the sculpture. I was trying to remove myself from the noise and chaos, to calm my mind, to express to the world something I didn’t know how to say.
A human connection
It is often difficult for me to completely engage with people, whether that be individuals or social groups. This has sometimes made for awkward working and personal relationships. It has also caused me a great deal of consternation over the years.
I have a genuine desire to connect with people but for some reason there always seems to be an invisible barrier.
In this series of empathy chip malfunction posts I want to explore some of the things that might be responsible for that barrier.
An emotional desert
Expressing emotions and understanding those of others, is not one of my strengths, often leading to miscommunication and misunderstandings. Because of this I become frustrated, which can come across as cynicism, lack of empathy, or even aggressiveness or arrogance.
But all I’m trying to do is navigate this world using the tools I have to hand, just like everybody else. Sometimes we might be unknowingly choosing the wrong tools.
But who truly knows themselves?
We can only know what we choose to admit to ourselves, or what we choose to focus on. This will be a challenge for me because I have nearly 50 yrs worth of ideas, conflicts, and contradictions, rattling around in my head.
What’s it got to do with art?
One might question the value of taking a personal journey in what is mainly a website about my work, and I would have agreed, but I am my work and my work is me. In essence, I’m trying to describe what my work is about, because in some ways it isn’t about anything, but it is also about everything.
More from this series:
Part 5 of my ’empathy chip malfunction’ series. This is probably the final instalment and where I try to tie up the loose ends.
This is the fourth post from my ’empathy chip malfunction’ series. This time I’ll be looking at emotional distance.
Part 3 of my ’empathy chip malfunction’ series: education
Part 2 of my ’empathy chip malfunction’ series: migraines